Today a total stranger grabbed my breasts, shoved them between two plates of glass and squashed the buggery out of them.
And oh the pain: it grabbed me by the mammaries, leaving me a shivering, whimpering mess.
My pain threshold has never been high (hence my aversion to childbirth), but today's mammogram hurt so much I cried out several times, found it hard to breathe and was tempted to ask the radiographer if she was open to bribes.
But with a shocking SEVEN woman a day in NZ being diagnosed with breast cancer (that is not a typo, yes seven women per day in little ole NZ), I realised I had to suck it up.
Three hours later and the poor girls are still aching. I am now going to self medicate with chocolate because if there is pain, then there must be Whittaker's Dark Almond chocolate.